Interpreting the Signs by Adrian Slonaker

Scheduled to appear in WINK #22

Interpreting the Signs

On special Saturdays
in the early eighties,
when electric cowboys competed with Pac-Man (and Ms. Pac-Man)
for the pinnacle of pop culture,
my brother and I played “Love Boat” in the rumpus room
with the Robinson girls while
our parents prattled and picked at crab dip and crackers in the kitchen.
The supersized sofa became the cruise ship,
with the bean bag, La-Z-Boy, and coffee table
doubling as Acapulco, Mazatlan, and Puerto Vallarta.
Andy was “Gopher,” and I settled for “Doc,”
though I secretly wished to mimic “Julie,”
a role claimed by Lauren or Allison.
Lizzie the calico cat could be
any sun-kissed celebrity
lounging on the lido deck.

After meandering through our makeshift Pacific Ocean,
we preteens hatched plots for even more pleasures--
perhaps the community swimming pool or even a cheese and sausage pizza
from Benvenuti’s.
We’d scramble upstairs to present our pleas
with faltering finesse,
having concocted the formula:
“‘We’ll see’ means yes.”
“‘Maybe’ means no.”
With our success rate flatlining below fifty percent,
divination was definitely best left
to psychic hotlines and the Magic 8 Ball.

—Adrian Slonaker

Language professional Adrian Slonaker lives in Moncton, 
New Brunswick, Canada. Adrian's work, which has been nominated 
for Best of the Net and the Pushcart Prize, has appeared in 
Ponder Savant, Gnashing Teeth, Keeping It Under Wraps and others. 
This poem is scheduled to appear in WINK: Writers IN the Know 
magazine, issue 22 (Spring 2024). Adrian is a long-time regular 
contributor to WINK.